In today’s fast-paced corporate world, the idea of career guidance often extends beyond HR and mentors — now, even colleagues have taken up the role of “career counselors.” But what seems like friendly advice at first glance might actually be harming your growth. As a motivational speaker and relationship coach, I, Sandip Agrawal, want to shed light on this critical but rarely discussed issue.
The Silent Infiltration of Peer Counseling
The moment a new employee joins an organization, a few colleagues — not all, but some — approach them under the guise of being friendly. These interactions may feel like a warm welcome, but they often turn into subtle manipulations.
They begin with questions like:
- Which company were you working at before?
- What is your current salary?
- Why did you leave your previous job?
- What is your educational background?
The new joiner feels accepted and assumes these are genuine friendships. But soon, these “friends” begin the process of career counseling — one that’s not in your best interest.
They start saying things like:
- “You’re too talented to be working here.”
- “With your experience, you should be getting a much better salary.”
- “This company has a very toxic environment.”
- “The last person in your role was great but left because he couldn’t tolerate it.”
This triggers self-doubt. The new employee starts questioning their decision. They think: “Are they right? Am I being underpaid? Is this job worth it?” Eventually, the mental stress pushes them to quit — often without a backup.
So who really loses?
- The employer loses a promising employee.
- The employee loses a job and possibly their confidence.
- And the toxic colleague? They move on to the next target.
Why Does This Happen So Easily?
1. Lack of Proper Information
New employees rarely have a full understanding of the company. Toxic employees fill that gap with negativity. Since no place is perfect, new joiners tend to believe the bad over the good. They don’t realize that management didn’t hire them to harm them — but to help the company grow with their skills.
2. The Salary Trap
Many people change jobs repeatedly just for better pay. Toxic coworkers feed this mindset:
“You’re working for so little? I know someone who’s earning way more!”
This leads to distraction, decreased work quality, and no long-term growth. The question is — at what cost are we willing to trade our ethical values, peace of mind, and work satisfaction?
You can’t be truly successful or happy if you’re working in a negative mindset just for the sake of money. The universe gives back what we emit — spread positivity, and success will follow.
3. Not Asking the Right Questions
If a colleague constantly complains about the company, ask them:
“If it’s so bad, why are you still here after so many years?”
Don’t accept negativity blindly. Understand their motive — are they threatened by your competence? Are they trying to sabotage you?
4. Unemployment Risk
Leaving a job based on someone’s opinion can backfire. Will the next job really be better? Can you guarantee you’ll get the same or better conditions?
Often, the result is unemployment — and desperation forces you to accept worse conditions. Some companies exploit this by holding original documents, signing bonds, or offering poor terms.
And remember, those “friendly colleagues” will vanish when you need them most.
5. Learn From Experience
Reflect on:
- Why did you leave your previous job?
- Is your current job better in terms of salary, environment, and learning?
- What was missing there that you’ve found here?
Let experience be your guide — not someone’s superficial opinions.
6. What Should Management Do?
Management must ensure:
- Transparency in salary, expectations, and company culture from Day 1.
- Toxic employees should not be in key communication roles (HR, team leads, etc.).
- Maintain a positive work culture and treat every employee equally.
- Regular feedback and appreciation to make employees feel valued.
7. Employee Mindset
Employees, especially new joiners, should:
- Focus on growth, learning, and value addition.
- Avoid participating in gossip or negativity.
- Appreciate the job that feeds their family and fuels their dreams.
- Communicate directly with management if there are genuine concerns.
Conclusion:
In every office, there are two forces — one that uplifts and one that pulls down. Be aware of who you’re listening to. Don’t let someone else’s insecurity define your career path.
Treat your job with gratitude, your management with trust, and your coworkers with professionalism.
Your career is your responsibility — don’t outsource it to someone with hidden intentions.
